 Her legacy |
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Sweet baby angel
Daphne was born at 6:12 pm on November 22nd. She weighed 8lbs. 15oz and was 22inches long. She quickly left us for her home with Jesus. Daphne was named by her brother Dylan(big fan of scooby-doo :) ) Her middle name was a combination of her Nana's name Virginia and her Dandy's middle name lynn. She was and always be our beautiful Daughter!!!!
November 22nd 2005
That day started out so wonderful. I woke up with joy knowing my little girl I would soon meet. We got in the car and I remember thinking the next time we come home we will have our new baby. We walked into the hospital and to my surprise felt no fear. I got dressed in the hosptial gown happily got into the bed and started talking about what it would be like to finally hold you. We talked about the color of your eyes, would you look like your brother and daddy or would you look like me. The pitocin started to work and the pain's became strong but that was okay the pain meant you would be coming shortly. Family members came and went but my mind was only on you. I was so very ready for your arrival. Finally I reached 10 cm and I could try to push by that time they had just given me an epidural and Mommy wasn't pushing strong enough, they told me to rest to labor down. My baby I didn't want to. I was worried I wanted you out then in the pit of my soul I was scared. They came back and we begain to push again then everything changed, the nurse was panicked she said you were in distress .....then you were delivered. My baby I saw your beautiful body emerge from mine. Oh how beautiful. . You didn't cry right away but at first I wasn't worried, it took brother a few seconds. But then the nurses called to doctor over and panic and disbelief took over. We watched, your Daddy and I helplessly as they worked and worked on you. I kept looking at your Daddy for the reassurance that you would be okay, but my rock my best friend was crumbling right before my eyes. After a few minutes it was apparent we had lost you. Oh my baby why did you not stay? Why was I denied the sound of your beautiful cry? Your sweet Daddy wept and moaned for you. His little princess. I heard them call out a time and I screamed what is that are you calling her death? They were my baby I will never forget that clock hanging above the window. I had watched it all day and I remember looking at it and seeing that it was 6:34pm you were gone. Just like that my little love bug, who was alive and well inside of me only moments earlier was already in heaven. Nurses cried over praying for me and you. The doctor begain to cry. And Nana (daddy's mom) and Pawpaw(mommy's dad) came in the room. I watched as they handed you to your daddy. He sat down in the rocking chair his eyes filled with love and despair. I could no longer take it. At that point mommy went down hill and they realized I was in big trouble. I didn't even get to hold you right away my dreams of bringing you to my breast right after birth were gone they were only a dream. I was so wrong. They rushed me off without even being able to say goodbye. As I was pulled in the operating room I begged them to let me see my baby, my baby was gone didn't they know? Didn't they know how much I loved you, needed you, and wanted you? I awoke to the realization that you were still gone and was told the home you had lived in for nine months the thing that took your sweet life was gone. They had removed my uterus. I asked for your Daddy and when he came they brought us you. Beautiful big Daphne. You were already changing you were already cold. Mommy wanted to warm you up, but only Jesus could do that now. I told you how sorry I was and how beautiful you were. I rubbed your silky long brown hair and smelled you oh you smelled so good. And then I handed you back to the nurses. I am sorry baby. I am sorry I didn't hold you longer. I was so confused. I never saw you again.I remember them walking away with my baby, oh my baby I need you. The worst day in my life November 22nd 2005 was over but it will never be over to me. I live that day everyday. The day the we had marked on all our calenders with smilely faces is now the most sad day of our lives. I will never forget that day. I will never forget you and I long for the day we meet again. Please know how very much I love you and how very much I miss you. I LOVE YOU
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